Crap of the day

I’ve not been able to continue my write up on Journey to Remember due to the fact that I’m really hookup up with this blardy job plus all other unforeseen circumstances at home that makes me pissed off. Dunno lar, why I have this love-hate relationship with my job (or perhaps the hate is more towards the people rather than the job itself)

Right now I’m also not in my rational state of mind bcoz of things that’s been happening in this facking office. All these shitty thinggy had drive me nuts! To be honest I don’t give a damn what’s going to happen to this office. The people really sucks!! be it the big “bald” bos and all the facking assholes are only getting (highly) paid for nothing. These are the people who don’t walk the talk aka NATO (no action talk only). Who they think they are? With typical malay aka bumiputra attitude they are really lack of professionalism what more credibility & their head are full of craps.

Come on people wake up!! We are already six years past the millennium. What happen to the motto “changing of mindset”? What I see is the CEO is changing, the environment has changed but the GMs and Divisions Head plus other “Heads” that was being appointed, their mind are still hanging somewhere. Despite of having so called vast experience, they still had their brains at the bottom of their asshole!! God sake!

For the other members of the org, things may get worse. And whether this org will get better or remain in existence after that only God Knows. From now onwards, I will just stick to whatever is required only. That’s it. U guys do your own blardy work, I’ll do mine.

Anyhow, I’m looking forward for the long holidays with the family. Will be off until next week, so hope to write some more after I came back. Until then, adios people.

A Journey To Remember 2001 ~ 2002

2001 ~ Major Financial Crisis

Our financial burden became crucial and we brawl all the times. Hubby no longer contributes in the household expenses and I had to uphold all the liabilities. I struggle my way to meet the increase in expenditure by working seven days a week even on public holidays. I became extremely depressed with the situation until to some extent when the org offer VSS, I gladly accepted the offer. I felt relieve after sending my application just ten minutes before the closing hour. There goes my ten consecutive years of service with the org (1992 – 2001).

I had planned that I am going to settle all my debt with the compensation and make myself debt free and I did. I clear up all my credit cards, whatever small loan, etc, and the balance as a little savings incase I did manage to find a job. But god is great. Remember the job hunt I did earlier finally pay off when an org. called for interviews during my last few days with the existing org. I prayed that I get the job because only a few days left before I am officially unwaged (with a little compensation off course but definitely it will not last long before the money depleted). I need a job for an obvious reasons. Again, my prayers answered when I was offered the post. I was auspicious for being jobless less than a week before I report for duty at my new office.

By this time around, both BIL had already left the house to live on their own. They just left one fine day without giving any notice, similar to when they came as uninvited guest of the house. What a manner these young people have nowadays!!. Obviously I had no idea why they left and I don’t care. Later it comes to my surprise when one of them confiscates our car, which was purchased under his name. After massive negotiations, we failed to repossess the vehicle (I’ll explain this further in my future write-up) so I decided to use whatever savings to purchase a new MPV but I curse them that they are going to suffer because of their transgression.

2002 ~ Year of despair

While I was happy with my new job, back home was a disaster. Hubby and I are no longer in talking terms. The most heartbreaking outburst was when I discover that hubby was an addicted gambler with tons of debt owing to AhLoong. Without my knowledge he has been a frequent customer of PS from the time when he was transferred to his new office at JTP during the merger. My heart was so damn sore. I just couldn’t believe it. I worked so hard to lessen his financial burden and there he is creating another mess. He really makes a total blunder of himself. I confronted him for an explanation but nothing comes out from his mouth, not talking or telling me anything. The silence is deafening my ears. I just couldn’t describe my emotions at that moment.

I’ve got no one to turn to not event my parents. The only strength I have was the kids. (sob). I tried my best to keep going at the same time trying to figure out how to overcome the tribulation. By now hubby and I are in our separate bedrooms. We were not in talking terms as if we are both in a different world. We only exchange a few words on important matters otherwise we are like strangers in our own house. I continue to send and fetch the kids from my parent’s house and hubby will find his own ways to work.

I filled my frustration by surfing the net during my break and came across this matchmaking website that attract me to register with my nickname and to my surprise I begin to receive enormous response in my inbox. I get fascinated with my new hobby and soon found new contact and companion in the cyber world. And believe me it really makes me forget the entire sticky situation. I get associated with people who never fail to amuse me with their word of advice and get myself entertained whenever I was down in the dumps with their shaggy dog story.

This has also eventually changed my perception towards my entire life. I am beginning to be more conscious of my outer shell. I embark on aerobic classes and went for a stringent diet until my weight trim down tremendously. I had transform into a new person that I myself could not believe it.

(to be continued….)

A Journey To Remember 1993 ~ 2000

1993 ~ Beginning of hassle

His job requires full commitment and frequently travels outstation until it comes to a time when he gets frustrated with his employer. Eventually hubby gets himself a better job offer and decided to leave the org upon influence of his former schoolmate although I objected. No doubt the perks are far better than what he is getting but it was not a strong company and god knows how long the company would last as compared to his current org. Nonetheless, he left. And true enough the new job only last him for two years. He was jobless then. God knows how perturbed I was thinking to muddle through the misfortune but my prayers answered when hubby was reinstate by his former boss. He was offered a different post and attached at my then former office at WGT.

1994 ~ Home sweet home

When thing have settle down and we already had a steady income, we bought ourselves a brand new car. Soon after my confirmation, I started searching for property and found a good deal for a double storey terrace house adjacent to my parent’s house. It was a dream house that I have always wanted. Apart from its location, the price is certainly within our means. So we didn’t waited for long before we had the purchase completed and move into our own abode in late 1994. Our new home, new life and I can sense that hubby was glad that we finally move out from my parent’s house. (Actually within the period when Along was born, we did move out from my parents place a couple of times but we eventually return when times are bad and moreover we had no one to take care of the kids)

1995 ~ Worsening state of affairs

In 1995, I requested for a transfer to BS office, nearer to our home and because I was also expecting Alang. Hubby was even busier with his new post and now that we are no longer in the same route, everyday I had to wait for him to fetch me from the office. Hubby has this really terrible attitude when it comes to time management and it sucks all time. He will in no way be on time and he’s always ready with excuses. I became impatient of the long hours of waiting everyday that we begin to squabble. Unexpectedly hubby turns out to be more defensive whenever we had argument. Conversely I became hypersensitive while I was expecting Alang and hubby attitude really sucks. He was just like “do I care”? Needless to say in many instances, I will end up feeling the guilty ones as I am not fond to prolong the argument.

Another incident that pissed me off was when we move into our own house, two of my BIL also abruptly became uninvited guest of the house by moving in to stay with us. I could not say anything, can I? (although it’s my house, I’m the one who bought the house and paying for the loan?) To make matters worse I was also not in good term with PIL.

Well, you see, when you get to know the persons better, there will always be some differences, which sometimes difficult to understand. I grew up as town girl and being a contemporary person, I just like to be myself. I am not a hypocrite person and changed myself just to please others.

Unlike hubby, an obedient child to his parent and always do anything to gratify them. My PIL are very religious people (but in this case, hubby was not that devout) so sometime I can’t get along well with them (in terms of my thinking, my dressing, my attitude and so on). This has created some distance between PIL and me. Apart from that his other siblings also create a lot of problem for us. The only good thing is all my sisters’ in-laws are very accommodating. We share the same dilemma.


1996 ~ Little angel was born

Days went by and I gave birth to an adorable baby boy, Alang in Sept 1996 at SJMC. By this time around Along and Angah was already at kindergarten. My mother takes care of the kids when I’m out at work. Eventually when Alang was about six month old, I received an offer to pursue my Degree at my former Uni. I accepted the offer and there goes again my hectic life as a working mother of three, a wife and a student. I guess I’m so used to this kind of life that I am immune to it. Hubby doesn’t say much about my intention knowing that I had always have passion to further my studies to the highest level possible.

1997 ~ Hectic life again

Realizing of these multitasking duties that I had, I persist to drive on my own now. I’m no longer endurable to loiter for him to fetch me from office, what more to send me to classes and ended up being late. So I decided that I will drive to office and hubby will take the “Komuter” instead. During the day, I had to tussle at the office to complete my chore by 6.00pm before I head off for my classes. Lessons usually end at 10.30pm and I will drive the wheel like crazy Schumacher to fetch the kids and rushed home. Normally I will arrive home by 11.00pm.

In the course of period, I notice that hubby will usually arrive home much later than I am. Ask why is he being so late, his will just answer me bluntly that he has got work to do at the office. The simple term is Overtime. Of course I get very suspicious but if I bring up the matter, we will end up with unsolved argument. In the end, I just couldn’t be bothered because I have so many other things to concern rather than getting myself infuriated. Besides, I don’t wanna get myself pressured with all the nonsense that keep mingle in my mind. Even that two BIL of mine will offer no comfort.

Along the way, due to the economic downturn in 1997, the industry we are in had to be amalgamate. Both hubby and mine had no exception. Hubby org was merge with one of the big giant whilst mine was taken over by insignificant player of the industry, which made vast headlines but we are fortunate not to get laid off.


1998 ~ Exchange of environment

In the workplace itself, I am not in favor of so many issues. Most of my colleague & I can’t cope with the autocrative & insensitive boss and with the entire work burden on my shoulder, I get really hopeless sometimes. I even consider giving up my job (but of course I can’t coz I still need the earnings to support the family **sigh*). One disastrous outbreak occurs in late 1998 (which I will explained further in another write-up) and I felt horribly distress and fidgety. The incident would adversely affect my job. I didn’t inform hubby of the incident and I just keep it to myself, not even my family knows about it. Eventually I was transferred to another office and fortunately it was within the same vicinity.

1999 ~ Little baby girl arrival

The new office environment was more serene and found myself working with a bunch of jubilant people especially my chummy friend Minie. She helped me a lot recuperating the misfortune until I regain my courage. In the midst of work and study, I got pregnant again. But this time, I manage to complete my final semesters papers before Adek’s was due in June 1999. I told myself this would be my last pregnancy coz I don’t plan to have any more babies in the millennium years.

Hubby was still attached with his current org and always busy as ever. Concurrently he established a joint venture company with his colleague to undertake a contract awarded by Petronas. Apart from his current job, he does his part time work at night. But the joint venture collapse when a partner deceit and swindles their money. He disappeared with all the equipment leaving hubby & another partner indebt to AhLoong’s. So there begins another ironies of our lives.

2000 ~ Millennium bugs

May 2000, I was offered to work in one of the mini outlet launch by the org in AM Mall. The workings hours are from 11-7 and it operates 7 days a week. With the kids growing and schooling along with hubby financial constrain, I really need this extra income to scratch out a living. Furthermore, with its flexi hours, it enables me to send and fetch Along & Angah from school. By this time earnings is always insufficient to cover for all our expenses and we bicker a lot. By some means I can sense that something fishy is going on with hubby but I just could not unleashed what it was. Be that as it may, I concentrate on my new duties and the kids as my flexi hour allows me to juggle my time. Along was in standard four while Angah in her standard two. Soon after, I graduated and commence my job-hunting again.

To be continued...

A Journey To Remember 1988 ~ 1992

Time flies, really fast. Unconsciously, it’s almost 18 years ago when it all begins.

In commemorate of my 17th wedding anniversary, I wish to share my journey throughout the seventeen years of marriage, a voyage that has made me realize how much courage and faith one’s need to survive in this passage of life. I dedicate this to my kids just incase I’m not able to put in the picture when they grew up and mature enough to understand.

1988 – New episode of life begins

Hubby and I work in the same institution but we have never met due to our separate office location until one day when our office organize a yearly tournament held at YMCA Brickfields somewhere back in August 1988. That was the first time I lay eyes on him. Somehow he attracts my attention coz at a glimpse, he reminds me of someone I had known in the past. Eventually when the game ended, I didn’t even manage to get his name or his number but that does not make me stop thinking about this guy. I begin my query and auspicious enough he works in the same department with one of my close colleague, FA from whom I get hold of his name and number (office number of course, there were no hand phones back then) but that’s it. I didn’t make any attempt to call whatsoever, but just leave it as it is.

Apparently my friend, FA had told him about me and he somehow made the first move by calling me on one fine night when I was working late hours, a few weeks after. So there we were chatting over the phone almost everyday until we finally agreed to meet for dinner and so it all begins. I just knew from the first day we met that he will be my soul mate.

1989 ~ The Grand Day

We didn’t court for long when we decided to tie the knot soon after we had saved enough for the dowry & wedding ceremony. We were wed on 14th May 1989 at the mosque of my granny’s village in KP and the reception was held two weeks later. It was a simple wedding coz I decided to hold the ceremony at my granny’s place, which was just 30 minutes drive from hubby’s home.

Just a note to ponder, actually before my parent agreed to accept his proposal, we must first ensure that he does not come from the same “Suku” as I am because it was prohibited by our “Adat”. I was like huh? Is this a joke or another mythical? Seriously it never suggests itself that such belief will emerge but unfortunately it was not a trivial issue. In no circumstances will the marriage take place if the answer is positive. Anyway it was a relief to understand that he was not in our “Suku”. (mine was “Selemak” whilst his was “Tanah Data”) *Sigh*

Our journey since begins. He was twenty-four and I was twenty-two and in my second year of my DIB studies when we got married but that does not stop me from continuing. I persevere with my career at the same time pursue my studies while hubby was working shift hours during the early phase of our marriage.

During early years, we rarely had problems with our marriage. Hubby was a very understanding husband and a caring father to the kids. Hubby being a “kampong” guy, he is the homely type of person, jovial & cheerful. I also describe him as a cool person and hardly ever he gets teed off. On top of that he’s very endeavor to his job. He’s a workaholic. Working in IT technical & service niche requires him to spent most of his time at the office and working until late hours is nothing out of the ordinary.

On the other hand, I describe myself as a very envious & possessive person and my biggest weakness was my bad temper. I can simply get on my nerve if I sense something amiss. Throughout the marriage as far as I can remember, I’m always the one who initiate any argument whilst hubby will just keep his silence.

I am also very blunt person. I will just speak my mind out if I dislike certain thing in a very sarcastic way. Hubby will always quote that I am a stubborn person, and perhaps he was right. I am stubborn but for a reason. My reasons my not vindicated but it’s how I look at matter from my point of view. But above all hubby has never laid a finger on the children nor me no matter how harsh I may be.


1990 ~ A Child was born

We stay with my parents and a year later I gave birth to Along. I took a year break from my studies to give full attention to my newborn baby. With god’s blessing, hubby was promoted when Along was born and no longer require to work shift hours. We were proud to be parents at young age even though we had some difficulties initially (Along). The year was full with blessing when we able to have out own transport. At this time, I had transferred to from my office at WGT to OKR office, which was closer to our house and a stone throw away from my campus.

1992 ~ The arrival of Angah/Graduation Day/New Employer

Two years later during my final semester, I gave birth to a cute baby girl, Angah. She was born a week before I sat for my final exam and with god’s willing, I manage to complete all seven papers during my confinement. I was so relief now that I have completed my Diploma, I can concentrate full time on my two kids.

At the same time, I started seeking new job opportunity and with God’s Blessing, I grasp an opportunity from one of the leading org in the industry that offers better position & greater remuneration. The only lacking was that one of conditions imposed was to undergo intensive training at Bangi for four months. I had no options but to make the sacrifice and leave my kids in the care of my parent. Hubby had no objection, as he himself was designate huge assignment to be completed during the year.

In the interim, we had our hard times when income could not cater for our increase in expenses thus we had to let go the car but still manage to make ends meet. Subsequent to my completion of the course attended, I was assign to PWTC office.

To be continued...

Happy Mother's Day

The past weekend was a delighted one being yesterday was Mother’s Days as well as our 17th Wedding Anniversary. However, we did not get a chance to go anywhere to celebrate the momentous occasion since Alang went for a school jaunt to Malacca on Saturday. But somehow we had my special home cooked lunch & dinner – Chicken Rice for lunch and Black Pepper Hailam Mee for dinner. Come Sunday, I had a severe migraine that I can’t even open my eyes and the best part is I had left the medicine at home in PJ. Bleargh!! I had to dragged myself out of the bed to prepare breakfast & after lunch was served I went to rest my head after taking two tablet of activefast but the ache still doesn’t go off. Hubby and I left KP at 9.00 pm and I almost vomited when we reach PJ home. I retire to bed soon after taking my medicine.

The kids hand me this note before I left last night. I felt so touched and happy too being appreciated as a mother . I am glad the kids knew how much I love them and contented having to spend more time with the them. Mommy love you too my dear kids and to my dearest hubby, I will always love you, now and forever, Happy 17th Wedding Anniversary.

Weekend Pleasures

I had a marvelous weekend with the kids. It was indeed a pleasant and enjoyable ones. At the point of writing on this blog, Along is still enjoying his so-called “holiday” at home. He has few more days before sending him back to KP to resume his study.

I pick the kids back to KL on Friday evening. Lucky me the traffic flow was smooth all the way and manage to reach home just before 8.00pm. right away rush to the grocery to buy some stuff for dinner. I manage to storm out Hailam Mee specially requested by my darling Alang.

On Saturday morning, we had scramble egg with bread for breakfast (of which Alang whine not his taste of breakfast – well this kid of mine is very fussy when it comes to foodstuff, too many abstention - in the end he just had “teh tarik” and “keropok") whilst Along, Angah and Hubby still under the blanket. I dunno what time they got up bcoz by then I’m already at the neighbor house giving a hand for their I kenduri. We had lunch at the kenduri after which all of us dozed off till evening.

Late evening, the whole bunch went to visit my auntie at SP. Its been quite sometime since we last visited them (which we usually do those days when the kids were here) so its kinda family get-together for all of us. As usual auntie will prepare her specialty cuisine i.e Hailam Mee (oh no, not again?? but Alang’s face smiling away hehehe - actually my aunt was the one who gave me that recipe)

Left auntie’s place at about 7.00pm for KLCC. It was quite surprising actually, when KLCC was less crowded than the usual (during weekends & holidays). We went up to Kinokuniya as the kids wanted to buy some books. Angah as usual bought herself a novel whilst Alang and Adek had their storybooks. As for Along, nothing at his interest to purchase? Hubby was just browsing outside the shop coz he can’t stand the kids searching all over the place for the books and subsequently undecided, which books to buy (if possible they wanna have all but mommy have limited cash-on-hand J) hence each one get one only. After the tired round of browsing, we went off to the square to enjoy the fountain show. We take our leave after spending about half hour or so and continued the night at mamak’s for supper. Upon reaching home, I was dead beat and straight away went to bed with Adek (after preparing Adek’s milo in a feeding bottle, of course – yes she is still on bottle feed at the age of seven) whilst Angah and Alang can’t wait to start off with their reading adventure. I felt asleep soon after leaving the kids in their own planet.

Sunday was heaven as everyone woke-up late so was mommy. Anyway I got up just in time to prepare fried rice for breakfast before it begin hullabaloo when I started screaming everyone to get up and get dressed to attend the wedding. We arrive at the wedding in Kg. Semarak (it was a squatters area so its kinda inconvenience for car to pass by and we had to park the car one km away from the house) almost 2.00pm but the place was so crammed that we had to park ourselves on separate tent. The kids were sitting in one corner and hubby and mommy had to sit another corner. Anyhow, the bride was so enchanting in stunning green kebaya whilst the bridegroom was quite a good- looking guy. I think they are such a matching couple. I wish them a happily marriage ever after and always remember that marriage is not the end of problem but the beginning of hassle hehe! (isn’t that so true, people? – hey I’m talking thru my own experience occay)

Subsequently after the wedding, except hubby, everyone opted to proceed to BTS thus majority prevail. Traffic was rather congested on the way to BTS from JTR headed towards Imbi but we finally made it to BTS. We park the car at the adjacent building (where the AB office was) and it costs RM6 per entry. Blearghhhhh!

Alike KLCC, BTS too wasn’t that crowded either and we had our free and easy browsing the shops until Angah enter one of the VCD’s shop searching for her favorite Korean movie “Save your last dance for me” (sound familiar?). I notice she has been eyeing for this stuff ever since it ended on TV screen and she had the title & character written everywhere on her study table. I did thought of buying it as her birthday present recently, but I find the cost was incredibly expensive (it cost RM139.90 at Speedy.) Apparently the shop was selling at RM89.90 only! Angah told me she has saved up to RM60 from her pocket money for that purpose and request me to top-up another RM30. Considering the efforts she made, I generously give her my portion as a belated birthday gift. I can see how excited she was while Adek & Alang gave the impression of sharing the joyfulness. Along as usual kept his silence as if he was in his own world. No request no nothing.

We continue browsing until we reach the Cosmo World. Only the young ones prefer to enter the theme park whilst the eldest prefers to walk around the complex so hubby agreed I took Alang & Adek into the park. The admission fees cost me RM55 for an adult and two children. Well its considered reasonable as compared to LGT theme park hehe. Alang & Adik enjoyed themselves with their cho-cho train ride, the crazy bus ride, the merry-go-round and the flying bees. Unfortunately Alang exceeded the maximum height for the bumper-to-bumper and the ship ride. He was frustrated so I had to cheer him up with the sand arts colouring instead and had to spent another 20 bucks. (mommy pokai big time beb!)

Make our exit after spending more than two hours in the park and hubby had his furious face already (well everyone will get on their nerves if they had to wait for more then an hour would't u?). On the way home, we stop for “teh tarik” at mamak’s and afterthat send Alang & Along for hair cut at Nathan’s. While waiting for them, I prompted nearby pasar malam to get stuff for dinner and we proceeded home thereafter.

When dinner is over, everyone had their own agenda. Alang & Along were busy with PS, Angah already enjoying her VCD whilst hubby at the PC playing the zuma game. Adek continued reading her storybook and myself just can’t wait to exit to bed.

Come Monday I’ve got to send them back to KP except for Along. Hubby & I decided that I will be the one sending them back coz my dad had requested to leave the other car at KP whilst hubby & Along will be maid of the day to do some spring cleaning. Eventually I will get a ride home from my brother whose on his way back from his holiday in KTN. We arrive at KP after a two hours journey. The kids were then busy preparing for school and by late evening there was a heavy downpour. My brother had to delayed our departure since traffic was slow moving along S-KP road and announcement at era that traffic was motionless at the north-south highway. We make a move about 10pm after saying goodbye to the kids.

Here I am again back to my hectic career and looking forward for another Friday to approach which means another delightful weekend with the kids. Adios fella.